October Wrap Up

October has come and gone.  I won't say it was a fun month, but I will say it was a busy eventful month.  Ambur and I have both been sad without Gimme, who knew I loved the sweet dog so much!  I complained about her fur often but she sure brought a lot of joy into our home.  Now, since September 16th, not only do we not have all of her fun, we have her sad human, Ambur and me and Ambur is still so emotional if she is asked about it or sees things and I crumble pretty quickly when I see Ambur as sad as she is.  So that is basically the mood in our house right now.

I got a message from Blaine that he needed to come and talk to both Ambur and I.  He came over on the 1st of October and we had a pretty good visit.  He seemed like he wanted to move forward....finally!  and he gave us the sad news that he and Sara are separating.  I am not surprised by that at all, I have always felt that their marriage was mine but the roles reversed.  I have watched her belittle Blaine to the point that I couldn't be around them.  And she has spoken such ill will toward Blaine's dad and doesn't want to see him and has made no secret of it over all the years.  She has also been sure to make a point that she hates the fact that Blaine looks like me.  Such silly things.  I was shocked to find out that the kids don't go to church (Sara hasn't gone for some time) even though they have been baptized and that was much more a surprise to me than that they are separating, and the reason Sara gives is that she got married to young.  I asked about counseling and Blaine said they are counseling type of people.  I hope they will get some help and salvage their marriage for the sake of the children.  They definitely need some help but it seems that it is a done deal and that Blaine will need a place to stay.

I found out that Ashlyn is playing on her schools Soccer team (she is number 16).  I got her schedule and went to her last home game and I was so surprised to find not one member of her family there to support her.  But it was pretty warm and I guess they are avoiding me.

She is really pretty good considering that she has never played before.  She got a couple of good scrimmages and she said she plans to play again next year.  I am glad she is involved in something at school.

I turned the big 66 this month.  I had a big trip planned to Las Vegas and was so excited to see my friend.  Well before we left I took the van in for a check up and it turns out the engine is dying in my van.  cost to fix--about 8-9 thousand dollars.  I know I will never have that kind of money so my mechanic told me that the check engine light won't go off but I could drive it for short trips just no big mountain viewing trips.  So no Las Vegas for me.  I would hate to have it just stop working on me on the big freeway.  That was disappointing.  Ambur and I went out to dinner on my birthday and we had a nice time.  Ambur gave me an Advent Calendar for my birthday.  I am very excited for it.  It is the Grinch on every square and come December first I will be able to start it.  It wasn't the best birthday ever, but it was OK and Ambur and I had a happy day.  I don't know what I would do without that girl.

Blaine asked if he could spend the night at our house and said he would sleep on the floor.  I told him I had an airbed.  I got it set up for him.  It looks pretty lonely.  I don't like sleeping on those beds.  He ended up just sleeping on the floor, he didn't like it much either.

It was my favorite event once again.  The Sheep Festival.  Some people really think it is stupid, and it gets a lot of controversary but I love it.  The local sheep farmers bring the sheep right down mainstreet and it is so much fun.  The ambiance is lighthearted and positive.  I actually ended up with a horrible headache and so I didn't get to go this year--it just isn't my year.  I took these pictures from the internet and lived the activity through the internet.

Blaine asked if he could stay over more.  I told him that we do have a 3rd bedroom that I would get at least ready for the floor to have room for him.  For the next two weeks I worked my tail off getting stuff moved around.  I have been wanting to move into the other bedroom so as to block noisy neighbors so I got started first getting everything out of the room I would be moving my stuff into and then getting my current room empty for him to move into.  

My new room-so full and unorganized it feels like moving in and it is very claustrophobic.  But at least I am getting things so they are OK and the distraction has really kept my mind off of being sad, lonely or guilty feeling, it has given me some purpose and something to do.  It has also helped Ambur some to think about it instead of Gimme.  The Lord has blessed us once again in our time of need.  Not in any way we expected, but in the way he knows we need.

Blaine helped me get the bookshelves down and I found a place it would fit without having to move anything but the freezer (which is on wheels).  It was so nice to get it down and all the books too.  Saved some body aches for sure.

This is how the room for Blaine looked -- I had a small TV and a desk so I let him use that and that is all that was in his room.  When he no longer needs the room I will be all set to get my projects back into that room. and mine won't be so tight.  That will be nice.

We got our first snow storm.  It is so pretty when it snows.  Ambur really loves it and I like it OK--especially the first snow.  We didn't get much but it was fun to see.  Hopefully we will get more through the winter.

  It is safe to say the sidewalks of Cedar City are not for walking-all the time- but often when they are, vehicles park over the top of them.  This is ok when Ambur has the dog to guide her along.  It is very difficult when Ambur is using her cane.  These houses have their vehicles over the sidewalk often.  One day Ambur got scolded by the owner for tapping his truck with her cane and she said she is blind and otherwise she would walk into it because it is illegally parked.  He didn't care, he was rude.  I called code enforcement and reported them and for the next few days it was clear.  Then they would have it parked over again and I would call again.  This cycle continues  onward.  I don't really know why anyone needs to park that way, but also they could be a little more considerate of her abilities---and the law.

I have been feeling so worthless of late.  I try to change my routine, I just don't have the desire.  I am alone 95% of the time or more and I really don't have any friends.  It makes me so sad that I just have no one but myself to talk to, and Ambur works so hard and she needs to get her own friends to do things with.  I am tired of the feeling of total loneliness and decided that I am going to get all my Disney puzzles finished and that will help my Disney wall to be complete. (a project I need to finish)  So I decided to start with this carousel puzzle.  It felt so good to get started on it.  I love doing puzzles they are so healing and it has helped me tremendously.  It isn't that big of a thing but it seems to give me purpose and I know they will look great when I get them done.

I don't exactly do puzzles the way others typically do.  I like the pieces all layed out for me to choose the pieces I want rather than sorting the colors.  

This puzzle went together very quickly.  I have done it before, and I have to say some of the pieces were still together, but it turned out great and as I got the glue to apply, I realized I didn't put anything underneath it.  So I got a poster board to slide underneath.

Let's just say that didn't work out so well for me.  A very good portion went to the floor and I could only laugh.  Ambur got down on the floor and started picking the pieces up. And I will just say that we got it picked up and this is where I got to start again--this time on top of the poster board.

I did get it all done and it looked great and will soon be hanging on my wall.

Last but not least, I got my shots.  I got four all at once.  I knew I would likely get sick so I prepared meals and put them in the freezer, got the house cleaned and scrubbed, did my laundry and was ready.  I asked if I could get them all at once and the pharmacist talked to me and decided it would be OK.  I got the flue shot, the RSV shot, the Shingles shot and the tDap shot.  Getting sick is an understatement.  I had a good 5 days in bed and aching but then I was done and I will do it that way every time I need them.

 October was, I think, the busiest month I have had in some time and I am grateful for it.  Life has been better because of puzzles and projects to keep me busy and feeling of some worth.  I have been shown once again that my Heavenly Father knows and loves me and gives me just what I need.  I am very blessed.